Ask the LifeQuake Doctor
I am feeling very encouraged about the state of the world. More and more people are talking about the power of love. Although this month is dedicated to love, I truly want to encourage you to look for opportunities to spread love wherever you can throughout the year. So many people write me about their love problems. I want to invite all of you, dear readers to keep a log this month that documents all the moments in your life throughout the day where you felt the presence of love.
Dear Dr. Toni:
I am a fifty- year – old divorced woman. I don’t have any children. I am in great shape physically. I am educated, attractive, fun, and …lonely. I work from home and find it difficult to meet men. I live in a big city where there are many beautiful young women and so, men do not look at me anymore.
What should I do, Dr. Toni? I don’t want to grow old alone.
The first step before you do anything external is to release your beliefs about your age being a detriment. What we believe does become our reality. Imagine a pink bubble of light and then send that belief into it and allow it to be dissolved. Next, fill up your heart with an abundance of love and affection for yourself until you are filled with joy.
Now, imagine yourself in a relationship with someone you feel truly at home with, completely yourself. Imagine that this person loves you and you love him. Let yourself have the feeling of being with someone who feels like your soulmate. Neither of you is afraid of commitment. Both of you are ready to truly be in a relationship.
Now, notice what feelings emerge? Does that scenario scare you? If it does, you have some internal work to do before you are ready to take action. If it doesn’t, then energize this visualization for three weeks without making any big external efforts like joining a dating service, etc.
At the end of three weeks, begin noticing men in the supermarket and smiling. When you’re in the elevator, smile to everyone. Show up AS love everywhere. Fill your tank with love from the environment as well. Buy yourself your favorite flowers. Walk in nature. Make physical contact with people you know by giving them a long hug. Just keep gathering opportunities to feel love and THEN if you haven’t met someone spontaneously, sign up for an internet dating site but don’t stop doing these practices I suggested.
Cupid is everywhere. Let his arrows inoculate you against feeling separate from the world and its love potential.
Dear Dr. Toni:
I am a lawyer visiting Los Angeles from another state. I read your column while sitting at a coffee house and got this impulse to write you. I figured, “what the hell.” I have been handling criminal cases as a lawyer for 30 years. I am so burnt out. My practice is dwindling because my heart just isn’t in it but I don’t know what to do next.
I have started having some health issues. My cholesterol is sky high and so is my blood pressure. The stress of my income dwindling and not knowing what to do next is killing me. Do you have any suggestions, doc?
It is no wonder that your blood pressure and cholesterol are so high. These symptoms may have to do with a blocked heart. You actually said, “your heart isn’t in it anymore.” I would suggest that you stop using words like “killing me”. Your body hears you, believe me.
Secondly, at the end of every day, scan the day and pay attention to what you were doing that gave you energy or that you found yourself interested in.
Thirdly, make a list of every skill you’ve acquired throughout your career. Then a second list of tasks you do in your work that you really enjoy.
And lastly, ask a few people you know professionally to share with you what they see in you that stands out as a talent or skill that could be transferred into another profession.
When I work with my clients on discovering what their next calling is, I take them through those steps. Further, there is one more step. Finding your calling is getting still enough to hear the call. Taking 15 min in the morning to get still and open your mind to receive an answer is the best possible way that allows for synchronicity to show up. For example, you may meet someone at your local coffee house that is doing something that could use your skill set in a new business they are forming. Opening up to miracles involves merely allowing for a change in your perception of how your career could transition easily into a vocation of destiny.
Dr. Toni Galardi is the author of The LifeQuake Phenomenon, a professional speaker, and career strategist. She works by phone with people all over the world. Call now for an appointment at 310-890-6832. You can also email the LifeQuake Doctor for questions that she will answer in her column here at DrToni@LifeQuake.net.